Holidays to the Centre of the Earth

Global property, entertainment, manufacturing and pharmaceutical conglomerate Arcane Developments are now moving into the travel industry, it has been confirmed. Furthering the corporation’s guiding principle to discover the truth about this world before exploring new ones, their new venture is to offer all-inclusive adventure holidays to the centre of the earth.

Each group of 20 people will burrow to the Earth’s core in a specially designed heat-resistant rocket launched from the top of Mount Yasur volcano on the island of Tanna in Vanuatu. The journey will take over a year to complete, and is billed as the greatest adventure the world has ever seen. Tickets are premium priced, but already attracting a great deal of heat.

Having the money to go is not enough though. Adventurous suckers will have to undergo a thorough vetting process involving health checks, life insurance policies, bank account access, will entitlements, property holdings and full waivers before Arcane Holidays will allow them a place on the exclusive rockets. Family discounts are available if an entire clan books a rocket for themselves.

Faced with the suggestion that he was merely plunging gullible customers down a volcano to a fiery doom to collect their life savings and assets, Arcane CEO Drax Coldheart laughed it off. “Hey man, haters gotta hate,” he said, offering this reporter a free no-strings ticket. “You won’t know how good it is until you try it.”

An early slogan for the adventure of a lifetime was ‘Pack your sunscream for a holiday in Hell’. This was later rejected as it was felt less hardened explorers may be put off by the risk factor.

 

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